Use what you know. Believe what you feel logical and you can understand. That is all you need. No one knows everything.
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IQ: Intelligence Quotientcapacity for learning, reasoning, understanding, and similar forms of mental activity; aptitude in grasping truths, relationships, facts, meanings, etc. |
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EQ: Emotional Quotientcapacity to recognize their own, and other's emotions, and to use emotional information to guide thinking and behavior.
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eSQ: extra Sensory Quotient Refers to extra senses, beyond usual 5 senses, which is very difficult to define or explain. They discover hidden patterns. Some have got skills to impress by their looks, way of speaking,.. and so on. Some claim that they can sense beyond human capacity, read other's mind, predict future, communicate with spirits and supernaturals and so on.
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AQ: Adversity Quotient is the ability of a person to deal with adversities or ability to turning obstacles into opportunities. |
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TQ (Talents/Skills Quotient):Competence, dexterity, experience, expertise, the ability coming from one's knowledge, practice, aptitude, etc., TQ helps one to do something well |
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In the 18th century, European philosophers and scientists, such as Voltaire, David Hume, Immanuel Kant, and Carl Linnaeus, proposed the existence of different mental abilities among gropus. An intelligence quotient (IQ) is a total score derived from one of several standardized tests designed to assess human intelligence. The many different kinds of IQ tests include a wide variety of item content. Some test items are visual, while many are verbal. Test items vary from being based on abstract-reasoning problems to concentrating on arithmetic, vocabulary, or general knowledge. IQ tests do not measure creative and artistic abilities. IQ scores are partly a measure of how motivated one is to do well on the test. IQ tests do not produce consistent scores across cultural groups. An IQ test may include questions that emphasize skills that are important to one cultural group, and neglect skills that are important to another cultural group.
Later Emotional quotient (EQ) was added in 1964 by Michael Beldoch. Emotional intelligence (EI) is the capability of individuals to recognize their own and other people's emotions. Use these emotional information to guide thinking and behavior, and manage and/or adjust emotions to adapt to environments or achieve one's goals. Studies have shown that people with high EI have greater mental health, job performance, and leadership skills. In 1983, Howard Gardner's Frames of Mind discusses Multiple Intelligences to fully explain cognitive ability. Multiple intelligences included both interpersonal intelligence (the capacity to understand the intentions, motivations and desires of other people) and intrapersonal intelligence (the capacity to understand oneself, to appreciate one's feelings, fears and motivations).
Adversity quotient (the science of resilience) was coined by Paul Stoltz in 1997. It is a gauge or measure of how one responds and deals with everything, from everyday hassles to the big adversities. AQ is being used for assessing one's current resilience and learning how to deal with everything from minor hassles to major setbacks more effectively.
TQ (Talents/Skills Quotient) like dexterity which is important for all, especially for professionals like surgeons, craftsmen and dancers. But TQ has not been discussed in detail so far. Each person has unique talents, which can not be considered under IQ or EQ. There are many cases of excellent carpenter or painter, with low IQ. Tribal artists do not score high IQ ratings, but can produce wonderful pieces of art. Some are excellent hunters.
eSQ (extra Sensory Quotient) is very difficult to define or explain. Some have got skills to impress by their looks, way of speaking,.. and so on. Most of the studies talk about five senses: vision; hearing; taste; smell and touch. There is much more than that. Physically, every one can feel heat, vibration, motion etc.. People can read other's mind and guess what they are thinking or feeling. For example, good sales person will use facial expression, body language and surrounndings/environment to decide, who is the right person to sell some thing. Great leader can mesmerize people. Astrologers calim to see hidden patterns and communication with supernaturals. A medium in occult sciences is a person believed to act as an intermediary between the physical world and the spirit world, capable of communicating with spirits.
- Ability to influence other person
- Ability to perceive information independently of, and beyond, the known senses (seeing, hearing, smelling, touching, and tasting).
- Ability to manipulate objects (including people) with the mind.
- Ability to foresee events or predict market (in addition to using analytical tools or techniques)
- Ability to see an event after it has occurred, like detectives.
- Ability to “read” information from objects.
Human with Super Capabilities
Real-life humans with "super capabilities" like super-dense unbreakable bones, the ability to smell diseases,, echolocation navigation,, resistance to extreme electricity. There people with rare, inborn capabilities called "real-life superpowers". They are known for heightened senses, unique genetic adaptations, or extraordinary neurological functioning. Some examples are:
- The Sherpa people in the Himalayas possess a unique, inborn genetic adaptation that allows them to thrive in low-oxygen environments.
- The Bajau people of Southeast Asia are born with a genetic mutation resulting in a 50% larger spleen. This adaptation allows them to store more oxygenated blood, enabling them to dive over 200 feet deep and stay underwater for up to 13 minutes on a single breath.
- Some born with a total inability to feel pain.
- Extraordinary Night Vision (Rod-Rich Retinas). Some may have a higher-than-usual concentration of rod cells—responsible for low-light vision—or a retinal adaptation that enables superior low-light vision.
- Tetrachromacy (Super-Vision)with extra fourth cone. Some can see up to 100 million colors.
- Some can use acoustic clicks to "see" surroundings, navigating, playing sports, and avoiding obstacles by interpreting sound reflections, similar to bat sonar.
- Some one blind, uses tongue clicks to navigate his environment, enabling him to bike and hike.
- Some possesses Highly Superior Autobiographical Memory (HSAM), allowing them to remember specific details of their life.
- Some can detect diseases (like dogs) through smell before symptoms appear.
- Some are reported to have x-ray vision and can see inside human bodies to visualize organs and tissues.
- There are many examples of persons: who can handle up to a million volts of electricity; control his body temperature; and can cook food with their hands.
Does Every one has some unique super capability, which goes unnoticed?
Limitations of Human Comparison systems
(1) All these quotients are just qualitative models to understand difference among individuals.
(2) There is no good method to compare individuals using these parameters. One can not compare musician skills with the dancer (like comparing oranges and apples).
(3) Most of the tests are unreliable, biased and favours certain group. But the concepts are useful to understand different people.
We all need Wisdom, which is beyond all these quotients:
- Seeing light in the midst of darkness
- Having hope, in the midst of fear and adverse situations.
- Seeing order in the midst of chaos and confusions.
- Knowing when we have to go fast or slow and when to attack or retreat
- Distinguishing truth from falsehood by keeping an open mind.
Wisdom is just to know, where and when a certain activity should be done before whose presence!
Selecting a career 123
We have lot of alternatives, when choosing a career or subject for study. Three step approach is presented. Consider an example of selecting subject for study.
1) List what all subjects, you will like to study (say top 12).
2) Out of 12 subjects, choose 6 subjects you are good at based on skills, knowledge and past experience.
3) Out of 6 subjects, select 3 subjects from resource and feasibility view point. For example, avoid golf though you are good in Golf, but does not have funds to take up that costly sport. Similarly there may be health constraints.
This method halves the alternates at every step. This can be modified and used in many cases.
The concept can be explained with the following venn diagram. Tha objective is to choose or select among alternatives, what you like, can do and possible to succeed.
Have to start maling 3 lists.
1 Capable list: What you are good at based on skills, knowledge and past experience.
2 Desirable list: All things, you like or want to do or achieve. Wish list
3 Feasible list: What will be possible to do from Operational constraints or limitations (They are factors or bottlenecks resources—physical, financial, human, or regulatory factors
This method can be used for any activity, not limited to career selection. These apply to individuals, organizations or even for a country.
The author after few presentation, came across similar concept Ikigai.
Ikigai: old Japanese ideology tied to purpose and longevity
A combination of the Japanese words “iki” (生き), meaning “life,” and “gai” (甲斐), meaning “value” or “worth,” ikigai is all about finding joy through purpose.
Similar Japanese words like hatarakigai (働きがい), which means the value of work, or yarigai ~ga aru (やり甲斐がある), meaning “it’s worth doing it,” also convey this idea.
Gai is the key to finding your purpose or value in life. The best way to really encapsulate the overarching ideology of ikigai is the ikigai Venn diagram on the overlapping four main qualities:
What you are good at; What you love; What the world needs and What you can be paid for.
Tools skills Wisdom
Skills or knowledge provide the technical ability to do something
Wisdom can be defined as the proper, ethical, and practical application of knowledge.
1) Tools or gadgets without skills are useless.
The value of any instrument lies in the operator's expertise and strategy. Even the best tools cannot produce quality results—and can be dangerous or wasteful—in unskilled hands, making proper training, maintenance, and technique more crucial than merely owning advanced equipment.
The skill, not the gadget, determines the final output. Learning to use tools is a necessary skill.
2) Skills or knowledge without wisdom is often considered useless or dangerous.
"Knowing Fool": A person can have high intelligence or skills and still be considered a fool if they lack the judgment to use their skills well. A tool, such as a chainsaw or specialized software, is ineffective or dangerous without the expertise to operate it safely.
Walking encyclopedia cannot apply its own information.
3) Resources or wealth without wisdom is a curse and often useless
Wisdom is required to manage, invest, and sustain wealth; without it, resources are quickly wasted. Money in the hands of a fool can act as a weapon of self-destruction.
Work-Hobbies-Service Balance
Achieving balance between work-hobbies-service will lead to Increased Productivity, Reduced stress, burnout and boredom.
1) Work - Occupation Earn for self, family and dependents
Earning for living for self, family, and dependents is a fundamental commitment or duty of anyone. No free lunch.
2) Hobbies for passion are activities pursued for personal fulfillment, joy, and mental health, often transforming routine time into meaningful experiences. These activities provide crucial, purposeful downtime.
3) Service to fellow beings, community, country will promote collective growth and elevating society. This will bring joy and personal growth. This can be even small acts, such as giving a compliment, visiting the sick, or simply listening.
Treat hobbies and service as "non-negotiable" appointments. Start with small, manageable activities and build up slowly. Use Small Time Segments if large blocks of time are unavailable. Hobbies and service provide necessary mental breaks that reduce stress levels and improve overall well-being.
Six types of work one does: starting with a in Tamil
1 Must do ஆணை இட்டு வேலை: Should do these, else you are in trouble like government order, tax filing, summons etc. Applicable to things one has to do to be a part of society or community or religion
2 Livelihood அவசியமான வேலை: Needed for livelihood, bread and butter for self and dependents
3 Hobbies, interests, and passions ஆசைப்பட்டு வேலை: Hobbies are relaxing pastimes. Interests are curious pursuits. Passions are high-priority, intense, and driving interests. They provide personal growth, balance, and happiness. Doing what one wants
4 Altruism/Service அடுத்தவர்க்காக/பிறர்க்காக வேலை: Acts of service or kindness—such as volunteering, donating, or helping a stranger—without expecting any reward, recognition, or return favor.
5 Useless work அனாவசியமான வேலை: got into because of stupidity, wasting efforts, work with out purpose leading nowhere. Useful to no one.
6 Unnecessary problem creating work ஆபத்தான வேலை : Work which will harm (physicaly or/and mentaly) you (some times others also).
How you do matters, more than what you do?
All jobs are important and everyone has a role to play. All work has dignity and value, often referred to as the dignity of labor. This highlights that from sanitation and factory/farm workers, nurses to scientists/engineers/doctors, managers/administrators, every role contributes to the wellbeing of a society/country.
Everyone deserves to feel that their contribution, regardless of its economic scale, is respected and necessary for the community.
[பிறப்பொக்கும் எல்லா உயிர்க்கும் சிறப்பொவ்வா | செய்தொழில் வேற்றுமை யான். Tirukkural 972]
அனைத்து உயிர்களும் பிறப்பால் சமமானவையே; ஆனால், அவர்கள் செய்யும் செயல் (தொழில்), செய்யும் விதம், ஈடுபாடு போன்றவைகளால் மட்டுமே அவர்களின் பெருமை/சிறப்பு வேறுபடுகிறது.
It is not birth but deeds that mark human. The manner of your actions—character, intention, and resilience—is more significant than the specific tasks or outcomes themselves.
"The only wealth is life," implying that any labor that supports human life and well-being has inherent value [John Ruskin].
"How You Do It" Matters: The journey, or the process, often holds more value than the final destination. This attitude helps individuals to find meaning and excellence in any job or circumstance, focusing on what they can do well rather than what they cannot.
Improve in whatever you do and contribute to organization/community/country. Kaizen (改善) is the Japanese philosophy of continuous improvement, focusing on small, daily, incremental changes to achieve significant long-term progress.
Meritocratic vision of Organization/society
A person’s worth is determined by their actions, character, and intellect rather than their birth or social standing. The true leadership and nobility come from personal achievement, competence, and virtue.
A person who does not do great things, will not become great, though occupying high position; A person is great, by doing great deeds, even if they are not in high position.
[மேலிருந்தும் மேலல்லார் மேலல்லர் கீழிருந்தும் | கீழல்லார் கீழல் லவர். Tirukkural 973]
One is not great because of one’s birth in a noble family; one is not low because of one’s low birth (p) Though (raised) above, the base cannot become great; though (brought) low, the great cannot become base.
A leader or Manager, should be selected based on specific merits—fearlessness, generosity, wisdom, and energy. Courage, generosity, wisdom, and motivation—these four are the indispensable qualities of a leader. [Tirukkural 382]
A good organization need does treat everyone the same in placement, but rather offers tailored opportunities for individuals to prosper according to their potential and needs. Individuals get what they need to thrive based on fairness rather than blind uniformity.
[வினைக் குரிமை நாடிய பின்றை அவனை | அதற்குரிய னாகச் செயல். Tirukkural 518]
A just, inclusive society allows every individual to reach their full potential, which in turn leads to the flourishing of the entire community.
Career Facts
- Life is not fair - get used to it!
- You are paid not your worth, but what your employer thinks.
- Good performer has to be a good actor. Make a good impression from day one to survive
- In any organizations, most of the people (employees, owner, etc) are worried more about their well being and benefits they get, than about the organization. Foolish to expect complete loyalty.
- The world doesn't care about your self-esteem. The world will expect you to accomplish something BEFORE you feel good about yourself.
- If you think your teacher is tough, wait till you get a boss.
- Working life will not be like student life. You don't get summers off and very few employers can afford to worry about your problems/issues. They are interested in output and profits.
- Television and movies are NOT real life.
- Everything has got shelf life including your knowledge, skills and abilities. Learning and self development has to be a daily exercise
- We are all imperfect (human nature). So, Do not expect organizations made up of people to be perfect. You are expected to learn and correct past mistakes and errors after analysis from the true source or logical thinking.
- Be nice to smart people. Chances are you'll end up working for one.
- Your job is not everything in your life, but just means of living.
Though You may be Good, but can not grow because:
Your Bad Boss will continue to survive, succeed and grow up! because Your Bad Boss has a good, tolerant, forgiving, accommodating and adjusting etc.. boss !!!
Your subordinates will do well, because you will take care of them.
Who can help you???
Work Scenerio
Efficient staff are required to repair the damage by others. It is better for some to do nothing, rather than do nonsense or damage.
Things for success that does not need special training or skills
- Complete all jobs in time
- Do not waste company resources which includes your working hours
- Follow all rules and regulations
- Avoid foolish controversies, quarrels and gossips
- No unprofitable and worthless activities.
- Be Sincere in whatever you do
- If you do not know or understand, ask or seek help
- Admit if you can not do a certain job, rather than spoiling it
- Go extra mile, do more than expected
Contribute when you can
1) One who knows must talk or tell others, otherwise, illiterate will misguide.
2) One who does not know must keep quiet, so can give opportunity for knowledgeable person to speak/talk.
3) All should listen to new information and different views on a topic, with unbiased open mind. Give more importance to content, than presentation or speaker credentials.
To become the very best
Homeowner to the plumber; Why are your rates so high, even my doctor doesn't charge this much?
Plumber to homeowner; Yes, I know that is why I no longer practice medicine.
Union plumbers may make more than doctors or engineers. Plumbers do make good living in developed countries like US, and so do electricians, but they cannot replace engineers. World needs an educated workforce to work more with head than hands. Good jobs are those that pay well, challenge us, are a good match for our talents and skills, aren't too stressful, offer room to advance and provide a satisfying work-life balance. But very difficult to find one best job that suits each of us.
One of our goals in life should be to become the very best. One should go any distance, and spend any amount of time necessary to “be the best.” Do not sell yourself short. If you want to earn more, you must increase your worth, your value to others.
It’s not what you have but what you do with what you have, will determine your success or failure.
Three steps you can take immediately to start positioning yourself as the authority in your field:
First, analyze yourself and determine your core competencies, the key skills that are essential for your job. How good are you in each one?
Second, determine what you will have to be good at in order to do your job in an excellent fashion in the future.
Third, create a learning plan and professional development program and start implementing from today.
Find a problem that many people want to have solved or a need for which people will pay. Find a solution and give them that solution in exchange for money.
Bad Personality Traits that can be made Good
- Little Messiness can inspire but avoid dirtiness and clutter.
- It may look bad to think of yourself and ignore others, but perfect selflessness has its own problems. Being a people pleaser will only stress you out. Think about you, when you worry about others.
- Learning how to say no is one of the most useful skills one can develop. You will not mess up things innecessarily.
- Self-confidence or personal marketing, is a good thing. It can get you ahead at work, help you find friends and partners
- Shyness need not be weakness, but comes with its own strengths. Shy people tend to be more reflective, observant and better listeners, than outgoing people.
- Being distracted can make it hard to focus on your work but it can also help you be more creative.
- Taking criticism is hard, so the world tells you to build up a thick skin. Instead, learn to accept criticism without taking it personally and use it to make yourself better. Just don not let it get to you too much.
- Healthy dose of pessimism is good. Thinking about everything that could go wrong helps you plan for those situations, and ultimately avoid them.
- Lazy to do work, leads to automation. Laziness can be the mother of ingenuity, if used properly.
Develop life goals:
Some people have known for awhile what they really want, but just haven’t pursued it. They just need motivation, some planing and determination to implement.
If you have no life goals, take some time for quiet contemplation. Think about what’s important to you. Have a clearly defined short/medium and long term goals with a clearly defined outcome.
Have some system to track a bunch of goals, broken down by periods of your life (1 year, 5 years, 10 years, etc).
Left Brain vs Right Brain Traits
Research suggests that the left brain is more verbal, analytical, and orderly than the right brain. It's sometimes called the digital brain because it's better at things like reading, writing, and computations. On the other hand, the right brain is more visual, intuitive, and creative.
The left brain is dominant for logic, maths/science, and critical thinking, and the right brain is dominant for creativity, emotion, and imagination.
Achievement-Based Arrogance
Some become arrogant because of some achievements. Because of their status, power, or skill level, believe they are better than others.
Tamil Poem with Meaning in English:
வான்குருவியின்கூடு வல்லரக்குத் தொல்கறையான்
தேன்சிலம்பி யாவர்க்கும் செய்யரிதால் – யாம்பெரிதும்
வல்லோமே என்று வலிமைசொல வேண்டாங்காண்
எல்லார்க்கும் ஒவ்வொன் றெளிது. - ஔவையார்
தூக்கணாங்குருவி கட்டுகின்ற எளிதற்ற மற்றும் நுண்மையான கூடு, கரையான் கட்டுகின்ற உறுதியான மண்மேடு, தேனீக்கள் கட்டுகின்ற தேன் கூடு, சிலந்தி கட்டுகின்ற வலை வேறு எவராலும் அவ்வளவு எளிதாக செயலன்று. அதைப்போல் தாம் செய்த செயல்களை வைத்து தற்புகழ்ச்சி பேசுவதில் பயனில்லை. அதுமட்டுமல்லாமல், தம்மால் சுலபமாக செய்யக்கூடிய மற்றவருக்கு கடினமான ஒரு செயலினை செய்துவிட்டு மற்றவரைவிட உயர்வானவர் என்று கூறமுடியாது.
Ancient Tamil poetess, Auvaiyar said, "Not everything can be done by everyone. Everything is easy for everyone. So no one should boast that I am the Almighty." The intricate and delicate nest that a sparrow builds, the sturdy mound that a termite builds, the honeycomb that a bee builds, and the web that a spider weaves are not something that anyone else can do with such ease. Similarly, it is useless to boast about one's own accomplishments. Moreover, one cannot claim to be superior to another by doing something that is difficult for one to do easily.
Donot become arrogant because of Popularity or position
விரகர் இருவர் புகழ்ந்திட வேண்டும்
விரல்நிறைய மோதிரங்கள் வேண்டும் அரையதனில்
பஞ்சேனும் பட்டேனும் வேண்டும் அவர்கவிதை
நஞ்சேனும் வேம்பேனும் நன்று.
Two deceitful people, may praise a poet with rings on his fingers and silk cloth, though the poem written as bad as poison or as bitter as neem. A person should remain self-controlled, even after achieving fame, says Aavaiyar, ancient Tamil Poetess.
Stress Free Career
I know few of my friends and senior executives who lived lived Minimalist life, and showed me an example. Unrealistic ambitions is like want to reach top floor with out going through middle floors. Progress in steps based on your abilities and work environment. It will not be possible to excel in everything.
1) Earn To Live Not Live To Earn.
2) Two types of activities, One For Earning Livelihood (just to earn) & Other Your Passion.
3) Say No or avoid activities which will bring only mess and problems.
4) Choose few top ones and concentrate and forget about others (ABC analysis). Wisdom is to select right ones.
5) Health is the only wealth needed.
Simple Tips
Below 10 selected tips
- Being intentional with everything you do. You will get more of what you want and less of what you do not. You will be in control of your work.
- Stop giving importance to every small problem, or issues in your life.
- Gratitude. No matter your income, status or skill-sets, if you should be grateful for what you have. Spend some time a day looking for things to thank. You will quickly be able to dissipate most negative emotions.
- Don’t even TRY to be perfect. PERFECTION is just unattainable and the pursuit of it will lead you nowhere. Learn to improve and evolve with the flaws!
- Live your life not someone else's. You are one of a kind.
- Don't imitate celebrities. They are lucky ones or created by business, politics and media.
- Everyone should be allowed to be what they want and how they want to be, as long as they cause no harm and not at other's expense. People should be free to explore.
- Everyone will have criticizers (not feed back) or people working against them. There will be always some one who does not like you.
- Things like wealth, position, education, grades does matter. Stop saying YES to anything you don’t want. One will hurt themselves for doing things just to impress others.
- Managing finances well, with out getting caught in a debt trap.
On Lighter side
Work place wisdom:
1) Work place is like a circus. Animals obey/behave properly with ring master to get rewards (cookies) or whipped for unacceptable behavior. (There is no good or bad behavior. But only acceptable and unacceptable behavior).
2) Other alternate is escape from this circus to other circus to work with other ringmaster. All circus have published and unpublished norms on acceptable and unacceptable behavior
3) Some lucky/smart ones can escape to wild to survive in harsh nature.
Perform or Make Room. When you have taken up a job, do it with out complaining. There are many waiting for the same job.
Tamil Proverb 1:"பேய்க்கு வாக்கப்பட்டால் புளியமரம் ஏற வேண்டும் (புளியமரத்தில் பேய்கள் வசிக்கும் என்ற நம்பிக்கை)". கெட்ட அல்லது விருப்பமில்லாத ஒரு செயலில் இறங்கிவிட்டால், அதன் விளைவுகளை அனுபவித்துதான் ஆக வேண்டும்
If you are married to a ghost, you should be prepared to climb a banyan tree (it is believed that ghosts live in banyan trees). If you engage in a bad or undesirable act, you should be prepared to suffer the consequences. No point in complaining.
Tamil Proverb 2:
"பேய் வேஷம் போட்டால் ஆட வேண்டும். நாய் வேஷம் போட்டால் குறைக்க வேண்டும்" - என்பது, ஒருவர் எந்த ஒரு பொறுப்பை அல்லது வேஷத்தை ஏற்றுக் கொள்கிறாரோ, அதற்கேற்ற செயலைச் செய்ய வேண்டும் என்பதைக் குறிக்கும் பழமொழி. ஒரு செயலில் இறங்கிய பிறகு, அதன் இயல்புக்கு மாறாக நடக்கக்கூடாது. எதைத் தேர்ந்தெடுக்கிறோமோ, அதை முழுமையாகச் செய்ய வேண்டும்.
"If you are acting as a ghost, you should be ready to behave or dance like a ghost. If you are acting like a dog, you should be ready to bark - this is a proverb that indicates that one should do whatever responsibility or role one accepts. Once one has embarked on an action, one should not act contrary to its nature. Whatever one chooses, one should do it completely.
No free lunch. You have to do your part, to earn your bread,
No one works in isolation. All form a chain, where each one is responsible for his part, and its output will afftect others. The strength of the chain is determined by weakest link. If one does not do his/her work, all will be affected. In a military, if you do not fight properly (with determination), you will be responsible for killing your own unit.
Even if you are self employed or not working for an organization, you depend on others and others depend on your work.
Measuring & Comparing Accomplishments
- Measuring accomplishments involves progress on several fronts such as: health; relationships; career; money; professional satisfaction; creativity; talent; and inner well-being. Accumulating money at the expense of health or family welfare does not worth it.
- Success should also be measured not just in terms of what one has achieved, but what negative outcomes have been prevented.
- Satisfaction, values, and impact, may be more important than just external rewards like praise or income.
It is not possible or fair to compare any two persons' accomplishments as:
- Every one is unique in every aspect.
- Everyone starts with different family background, health conditions, upbringing, resources, and environments. Opportunities vary.
- The reasons behind successes includes factors like luck or external assistance. Right place at the right time.
Comparing two persons accomplishments is unfair, like "apples and potatoes". Basically they are different, as one is fruit and other is a root vegetable (stem tubers).
- Compete with Yourself: The only valid comparison is to yourself from yesterday.
- Define Your Own Success based on your own goals and values.
- Those who are highly successful in their career want to make their lives quite simple, and those who run quite simple jobs/businesses want to grow their business and build an empire.
- Celebrate Others: Choose to be happy for others’ successes instead of feeling threatened by them.
- One can use others' success as inspiration ("I can do that too") or studying their methods to improve, rather than focusing on the differences between them.
You are the best. Keep trying your best and aim for continuous improvement according to your circumstances.
- Being your authentic self, without compromising on your integrity.
- Doing your best in each situation and not being preoccupied with the results.
- Always have the intention to help others, and be compassionate all the time.
- Remaining equanimous
- Working towards something that is not temporary or impermanent
- Taking relationships and other human beings seriously.
- Do not take things personally.
Trauma intelligence
The "Rare Smart" (Traumatic Intelligence)refers to a form of intelligence forged by high-stress or unpredictable environments (e.g., CPTSD). It is characterized by the ability to read people instantly, high emotional intelligence (EI), and a high tolerance for complexity.
Signs of Traumatic IQ: Indicators often include overanalyzing situations, anticipating worst-case scenarios, extreme empathy, deep intuition, and a need for control.
Survival Brain: The brain adapts to trauma by becoming faster at detecting subtle changes in tone, body language, or energy.
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